hit play and then let this entire song play while you slowly, slowly read this post.  it’s sixteen minutes long.

we took the kids out late, late last night — spent the evening with the gormans — who bought a house nearby on 47th.  when we got home, we realized we had no idea where the supplies were for sunday’s festivities.  you know, for that mythical bunny to hide.

fearing a failure on the scale of christmas, kara stated late at night that we’d just hide waterbaloons around the yard as some sort of stand-in for the eggs that owen is supposed to hunt.  the day before she scoured the luckys grocery store and all the walgreens she could find.  no go on novelty eggs.  they were barren.

i got up at six this morning, trying to win back credibility as a parent, went on the internets and searched for the safeway near our house.  knowing it was 24 hours, i jumped in the car while everyone slept off the night before (dylan and owen were up hours past their bedtimes, flirting with all the women at the party).  this song was playing in the car.  now, close your eyes, imagine the epic struggle of trying to find some stupid plastic eggs while this song is playing as the soundtrack to your trip.  still with me?

i hope you’re about six minutes in.  it builds, cinematically, as my quest for eggs continues.

entering the place is a bit creepy — it’s like the safeway time forgot.  everything looks old, broken and spent.  head down, i cruised in looking for novelty items to share with my kids today.  i passed the homeless guy on my way in who had just spent his donations on a 32 oz tallboy.  passed the produce section where apples had fallen from the night before on the floor.  and stood in front of what they tried to pass off as their easter goods:  two small tables of chocolate.  i couldn’t find much in the way of variety, but they did have two bags of chewy jolly rancher eggs.  i snapped up both — clearing out their supply for some other poor bastard who was going to wake up 10 minutes after i got there with the same sinking feeling in his chest.

i paid, left, and passed the homeless guy who just finished his tall boy and discarded the can on the sidewalk.  you’d think he’d recycle, but whatever…

now, on the drive home, at about 12 minutes into the song above, you’ll hear it winding down — almost the sound of victory really.  the whole event is silly, yes, but it does sort of sum up what being a parent is like.  for everything else, i had conquered this simple challenge at 6:30 in the morning.  but damn, i felt good.

owen had a blast today “finding” eggs.  by finding, it’s really walking around the backyard searching in wide open spaces for the obviously placed eggs.  we did what parents do and played it up.  oh, and we had mimosas.  that’s what parents do, right?

saturday night we went to mission street food. and i have to say — this is one of the reasons i love living in san francisco.  my dad will be the first to tell you that we’re a bunch of elitist bastards in this city, and when it comes to food — elite is good.

we called up our babysitter and then went out to feel normal again.  here’s the deal: mission street food is a foodie hotspot where every thursday and saturday they take over a struggling chinese restaurant in the mission and cook up some killer food. they change the menu (and chefs) for every engagement so the menu is always fresh.  we waited for an hour and a half to get seated (they don’t take reservations).  it was totally worth it.  here’s the menu:

Lung Shan’s Vegan Delight: shitake and oyster mushroom dumplings in miso soup – $5.5
Crisp rhubarb, apple and baby mustard green salad – $6
Souse Slaw: old-timey pork tongue terrine with cabbage, radish and pickled carrot slaw – $8
Blenheim Ginger BBQ’d pork with smokehouse beans – smoked and braised pork shoulder, slider buns and baked beans – $13
Tater Boats off the Gulf of Taleggio: deep fried russets with melty taleggio nacho cheese and green garlic – $7
Braised turnip roots and greens with smoked ham hock – $6
King Trumpet: mushroom, triple-fried potato, garlic confit, charred scallion sour cream – $6

Banana Pudding with Nilla Wafers – $5
Butter Fried Cornbread with mint julep honey and Humphry Slocombe sour cream ice cream – $6
Humphry Slocombe Secret Breakfast Ice Cream – $3.25

we ordered everything on the menu — minus the vegan delight.  the best part?  proceeds of our whopping 62 dollar bill was sent to 826 valencia.  in fact, the baby sitter cost more than the dinner — but hey — in both cases we’re supporting students.

and yes, the pulled pork was killer.  marc and aimee — put this on your list when you visit us next.  it’s totally worth it.

i know, i know, this blog is dedicated to the kids.  we get it.  then again, it’s nice just to get out with my wonderful wife.  i did use the word “baby piss” loud enough to get noticed though.

after an hour of playing on his playmat.  dylan decided it was time to take a little cat nap, on the floor, with the TV on and owen running around him like a crazy boy.